You Will Meet a Tall, Dark Stranger?

Till some decades ago, humans followed a very simple social code. You made friends in schools, colleges, hostels, workplaces, neighbourhoods, etc. Then you spent time understanding them and the ones making the cut for you viz. IQ, humour, values, helping quotient, career choice and comfort level, became your friends. You didn't have all these options, physical presence was the only way people knew communication or conversations and perhaps even friendship. People hung around at each other's homes, went for picnics, played cricket(guys), badmintion(girls), chess(guy girl flirt), got together for "Movie Nights" since only one or two families in a colony could afford VCR/VCPs.

Telephones were for emergencies, letters were for grandparents back home, internet snail-on-weed-speed slow, typing was for "office use only" and mobile phones, well, those were way too expensive anyway. 

People had opinions but not as many platforms to opine, so they talked to each other. And along the way found friends as a by-product. Real friends, which may be just 2% of the colossal pile of friends in one's Facebook or Google account. And sometimes people even found love or something similar but more real. I don't mean to say it doesn't happen anymore but less, very less. Love bit, even lesser.

Half-drunk at a friend's house-warming party, I go out to get some fresh air, my sinus is acting up to the smoke from every brand and type of cigarette known. Thrown into a limbo of silly drunk observations, I realize every single person in the room is on their phone, texting, FBing, whatsapping, tweeting, clicking pictures(to be put on FB instantaneously), talking(duh) or pretending one of the above. So much for a social gathering! I could well be hanging out with zombies. Just a change of menu; blood and flesh instead of  beer and, well, non-human flesh. Plus, it would have been more fun. Come on, a Zombie's house warming party anyday sounds more fun than that of an IAS aspirant's? They aren't real zombies.

My Bad. No Real Zombies. 

Great! And now who will introduce me to the tall, dark, hot guy across the hallway, in the balcony? He looks so familiar and yet has the charm of a perfect stranger. Maybe that is how cheesy, love at first sight feels like or I am really very drunk. 

He is on his BB too, beer in the other hand, in half conversation about F1 with another BB zombie. Seriously, Why don't you two just BBM each other about F1? Why take the load of talking even?

But still he looks cuter than most guys his age doing the three most regular things for a guy his age, standing against the balcony railing; beer, BB, talking F1. 

Someone calls him from inside the chimney cum house, "Osho, come on let's click some pictures with you, now." 

My tall, dark stranger's name is Osho? What parents name their son "Osho" in the 80s?
Rajneesh Osho wasn't exactly the dream then, right? He was getting indicted and deported from the US. Maybe this Osho is over 27 but looks younger.

Anyway, it's just a name. And maybe a divine intervention, his first name sounding like my last name. 

He comes back to the balcony, catches me staring at him, I look away and turn to texting(goddamn, am I a hypocrite or what?). 

I hear something I'm not too sure of hearing, "Roma?" 

What? Osho knows my name? 

Maybe he is psychic like the real Osho. 

Was the real one psychic? 

Well, this one is. 

Again he says, "Roma Joshi, Right?"

"Umm...Yes." I'm all surprised but look uninterested for I've gone pale.

"I don't think you know me, but I know you, as in know of you. We have like some common friends on FB. Small world. Haha." continues Osho. 

"I was briefly dating Sneha."

Okay, now I am totally confused.

He's trying to make me remember someone, poor thing he's counting on my memory, that too desperately. "Sneha Sharma, Miranda. She's school friends of that chap..umm.. I'm forgetting his name. Broad guy, they call him "cute ass"... "girly butt" or something. I think you are dating him? Words travel fast in the campus circuit, you know." And he winks.

Osho's first wink to me. A wink? eyyeeww. Strike 1. 

And how corny is "campus circuit"? Strike 2. I can smell a disaster approaching.

"I am sorry, I think I came on too strongly, it was a stupid question to ask about whatshisname. I mean whether you are dating him or not."

"A li'l stupid." I mumble.

"Okay so, Let's take it from the top. Hi Roma Joshi, I'm Ashwin Dey, How about we go and get you a refill?"

He sure is charming, I nod. "But hey I heard someone call you Osho."

"Yeah, phew, its the bong thing, you know. My name starts with an O. I am Oshwin Dey, totally detest it. Have to correct people all the time."

That name rings a bell. *glass shattering*
STRIKE 3

Data processing...

Oshwin Dey, 24, Stephenian, into advertising, likes Who's the Boss, 7 mutual friends, dated Sneha Sharma.

Sneha Sharma, doesn't share her birthyear on FB, Miranda, likes Gossip Girl, 20 mutual friends, dated Oshwin, school buddy of that douchebag of an ex-boyfriend I have.

I remember Oshwin from a comment he left on a picture of me and douche in happier times. It said, "Bada Shareef lag raha hai.. affect of being in a couple ;) Stay blessed!"

And I had fought the urge to correct him, "effect" not "affect". But I let it go as I barely knew him and douche's friends anyway were a wee bit weird.

"What deep thought are you in, Roma?" Oshwin has two beers in his hands. He hands one to me, "You don't have to answer my stupid question, if you are thinking about that."

A silly smile comes over my face, "Now I think you really want me to answer that. Haha. I was just wondering..umm..Who is the boss?" And I wink.

Oshwin starts sniggering, "Oh, the biggest mystery in the depths of the milky way! Haha.. Tony, hands down.

"Oh please, Angela was the boss, he was her salaried employee." I retort.

"Roma, don't take things so literally.. Boss doesn't mean like the freakin' oxford dictionary definition of a boss."

"Very nice drunk thought, Bhagwan Osho. Hehe. Cheers to that." I find myself enjoying Zombie's housewarming for real but the BB zombies couldn't careless to look up at the budding friendship.

"Sure..Cheers.. So Are You?" He gives me this curious shy smile continuing being cute and very charming.

"Boss-Yes, With Curvy Butt- No, not anymore." I say with all the naughtiness I can gather.

"What? Haha..Oh yes..that's what they call him..so is it?" Osho asks quickly winking at me for the second time.

"Well, not so much." It's my turn for the second wink.

You may meet a Tall, Dark. But a Stranger in the real sense of the word is highly unlikely.

Roma and Oshwin are now friends on Friendbook.